The N00b: 1.4.16. Fuck Ratting, And Other Tales.

The N00b: 1.4.16. Fuck Ratting, And Other Tales.

HEADS UP! We’re at War!

As a heads up, if you go into Empire space, please note that the Evictus Alliance is at war. This means that if you see folks in hi-sec that we’re at war with, they can attack you. 

How YOU Can Help Your Corp(s)

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What’s a N00b article without some tips and tricks on being a helpful corpmate to the corp(s) and Alliance you belong to? Here’s the shit you can do.

(1) Sovereignty Support

What systems? UL, 7MD, S25

But Wait, WTF is Sovereignty and why does everyone talk about it? I’m not going to go into details. Just read about it here. I barely get it myself.

(2) Make isk for your Corp

Ratting & PvE. Ahhh Ratting. I fucking hate it. I’ll go into details on why I hate it later, but for now just know that you can rat and when you DO rat and collect the bounties, a small percentage goes to your Corp. Why does it matter? Because then you don’t have your CEOs going “I NEED ISK GUYS”.

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If you don’t rat and you never intend to, but you DO explore…the rule I follow is to donate 10% of the value of whatever I find to the corp. Makes you feel less like a freeloader.

(3) PvP

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What’s Eve without a little PvP? As you Virgins may notice, you guys moved down to nullsec, where there’s ALWAYS a PvP battle to be had (Unless you’re absolutely terrible at it). How do you join up in those battles?

  • Find corpmates, fleet up, go crazy.
  • There’s almost always a standing fleet in 7md (at least this past weekend!). Play bodyguard.
  • P-Fleet is your friend. Especially during the European hours, you can always check and see if there are fleets available.

For the uber nublets, why does it matter? Because Eve is about killing. And killing ships means you’re basically representing your alliance & corp in the Provi-bloc. And we’re always trying to make ourselves out to be badass mother fuckers. That and if you have no idea how to pvp, the CVA fleets are a fantastic way to learn how to PvP in a relatively safe (I mean that in the loosest way possible) environment.

(4) Take up a support role

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Technically this falls under #1, but take up a support role that doesn’t involve PvP but still helps out your brethren. What can you do?

  • Mining, Mining, Mining (yawn). If you’re a Virgin, there’s an Ore exchange program too. If you’re Council, you’re already dank as fuck, so hoard all the ore.
  • Hauler. There’s always someone who needs something hauled from hi-sec to null. It’s not the safest way to take up a support role, but you’ll be doing everyone a favor.
  • Manufacturing & Research. There’s always a need for more ships, more parts, more blueprint copies, more everything. Talk to your CEOs and see what you can do to help in this.

7md, the new it spot of Evictus

Are you a miner or a ratter? Well then! Head on over to 7md, where you’ll typically see boosted mining fleets on 24 hours a day! At least, in the past few days…

It’s also fun to see an entire local channel of purple because everyone and their mother has decided to fleet up.

An Introverts Quick Guide To Eve

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So you decided to play Eve and felt the need to join a Corp. You were possibly lured to the Corp by a smooth-talking snake (I won’t name names), or maybe you just randomly found a recruitment advertisement on the forums and thought “Fuck it”. Well, there’s a spot for you too!

You can still play Eve and enjoy yourself, without the need to ever talk to anyone, ever. How? Exploration.

What’s exploration? You fly around, scan down signatures, find Data and Relic sites, and hack the shit out of them for phat l00t. Then you sell that shit at a station. End of story. Simple as fuck. And you don’t ever need to ever deal with people ever — even your own corpmates!

Favorite ships of mine to use for exploration: Buzzards

Favorite Jimmy Choos for exploration: Astero

It’s fairly low skill requirements to use those ships and to explore, so it’s a great way to fly around nullsec and do shit.

BUT REMEMBER: MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A COVERT OPS CLOAKING DEVICE OR YOU WILL GET FUCKED OVER.

NO SERIOUSLY. YOU WILL GET RAPED. RAPISTS EVERYWHERE.

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OMG, We’re NRDS and there’s a Neut in system!

I’m getting really tired of seeing the following in any of the channels we haunt:

‘Neut in system, are they KOS?’.

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Here’s an easy fucking way to check in-game if they’re KOS:

  • Go to the alliance channel, there’s a link to the KOS checker for the in-game browser. Input name.
  • Download the KOS checker overlay for your computer. I’m too lazy to put down how to do it, so go ask someone ingame.

The only time it’s okay is if you’re chasing or being chased.

What’s great is that once you see the bright green NOT KOS, you can then individually set the person to a good standing on your own, and then you never had to ask again whether they’re dangerous or not. If you’re Council, we typically do this for you as a corp-wide favor. If you’re a Virgin, do it on your own because Branson aint doing it and unfortunately, there’s no one that we’ve been able to find that has the rights to do this for the corp. Sucks to be you.

If there isn’t any information found, that means one of two things. You either mistyped the name, or they’re just unvalidated. Either way, be wary as fuck.

Obviously, if you get a big old bright red ‘KOS’, then for fucks sake, set them to red and tell your fellow corpmates and alliance mates so they can do the same. Why? See two paragraphs above.

A N00b’s Guide to Ratting

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I’ll just start by saying, I fucking HATE ratting. Why? Because I suck at it. There’s two ways you can rat — you can either go in close and pew pew them, or go REALLY long-range and pew pew them from afar. There are pitfalls to both.

Long Range Ratting:

  • Can take forever if you don’t have the skills to pwn with cruise missiles
  • You can still take serious hits, and it sucks because you probably didn’t fit your ship well enough to tank. Sucks to be you.
  • You’re far out from the wrecks. Bring a fucking Mobile Tracking Unit and for fucks sake, use it.

Short-Range Ratting:

  • TANK THAT SHIT. If you’re ratting against Sanshas, remember the golden rule of tanking: EM and Thermal resistance! JUST FUCKING DO IT.
  • Fuck Collidable objects. Want to know what sucks? Getting stuck in a collideable object and watching your 800m ISK ship get blown up by Sansha rats because your ass can’t warp out. Don’t be a n00b. If you’re solo ratting, just avoid those sites. It’s not even fucking worth it. Take it from me.

Here’s a full guide to how to rat, because I’m too lazy to put one together, and too lazy to ask corpmates to write one.

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Have problems with anything I’m writing? Send me a PM. Don’t reply all. I’ll troll you hard. If you’re nice about it or catch something I need to tweak, I’ll make the update asap.

Want to add to The N00b? PM Erani Daern or Gnimral. I can’t make all this shit up myself. oV