The N00b: Drunk Fleet In Nullsec (7.4.15)

READ ALL ABOUT IT, READ ALL ABOUT IT
Provi Site running turns into “Epic N00b Mistake”

C6 & Virgins on a friday night
C6 & Virgins on a friday night

I was invited to contribute to the N00b recently, and I was honored, because the whole piece is excellent, and Erani has done a great job of keeping up on life in both Provi and high-sec near the Gallente-Caldari Border Region.

I was gonna write tonight about how Branson got put into Imperium Technologies’ Anal Sex & God channel, because he started singing with little warning, but then we ran a couple sites, and I lost the touch for characterization of fleet OPs, and Anton got stuck doing all the salvage (although there were offers to help), and eventually Erani Daern went AFK with an “I’ll be back in a minute,” which was a relatively ambiguous statement, considering that over 240 seconds later she was still burning away from the Blast Furnace (RBF) toward the nearest planet.

Five minutes later, a host of C6 members (headed by a drunk yours truly and with combat support from extremely drunk FC Fishweasel, Mrando, Branson, and Anton) escorted Erani’s outward flight with mucho gusto, and this corporate response was right on point, because a single red with an unseemly biography entered GN7 and the mates proceeded to run point, scout, and support in a timely fashion.

And twenty minutes later, after some corporation skirmish and some discussion of whether-or-not-to-dispose of the Vexor on grid:

“I thought I had docked.”

“I went to the store . . .”
And she was back.

Jesus_facepalm
And it was good, because everyone then realized that C6 members and Virgin Plc. fliers (including newer adds on both teams) are a sort of family.
Bottom line:

One pilot fails to verify that they’ve docked before going AFK and everyone else shows up to make sure that no KOS show up to pop a Vexor. That’s the spirit.
Also: If you’re gonna DOCK, verify that you’ve DOCKED before going AFK, especially in NULLSEC.
A big shoutout to the Virgin Plc. and C6 family. This is a good group. The obvious actual bottom line about being AFK in space, regardless of where you are, is that fellow pilots worry about “I hope they’re okay in-real-life.” Anton was like, SHIT, is she okay? And we were really worried as a result of that insight. Like. FUCK. Is she okay?

That’s a real, serious thing, and it shows. That’s why, when Vex Colon, or whatever his name is (JAWCO bitches), comes near Provi gates, EVICTUS will show him the fist (right, EVICTUS?). We’re Capsuleers, mates (and lady). We don’t stand down to solo-male-singer wannabees or ner-do-wells of any sort. We don’t let the N00b go AFK with little-notice without showing-the-fuck-up to orbit you and shoot at you until you get-the-fuck back to your ship. We will kill you if you war-dec us, etc.
Fly safe y’all. It’s been an honor writing for the N00b.
ST [VIRG], DS {VIRG}, Omjun (C6), signing off. o7

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Drunk N00b Forgets To Dock in Nullsec: Hilarity Ensues

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Tips to participating in fleet ops when drunk:

  • It’s a bad idea to do it. Expect shit’s going to happen.
  • When planning to dock, actually dock.
  • If you forget to dock, putting your afterburners on and leaving your desk to go to the store is a horrible idea.
  • When you come back, don’t wonder why your entire corp is swarming and targeting you.
  • Friendly-fire is legal in nullsec and in C6.

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Want to add to The N00b? Send your articles, tips, tricks, ideas, feedback, etc to Erani Daern or Gnimral.

oV

Erani Daern – C6 Officer of Good Times & Editor-N-Chief of The N00b

Gnimral – Mother Superior of the Virgins

 

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